| This Is Where I Put Stuff I Don't Want To Lose |
I love this story. My friend Dana sent it to me. It's long but you gotta check it out.
A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying
the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.
He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead
for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.
After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of
the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was
broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing
before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like
mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure
gold. He And the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he
saw a man at a desk to one side.
When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"
"This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.
"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.
"Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought
right up."
The man gestured, and the gate began to open.
"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler
asked.
"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."
The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and
continued the way he had been going with his dog.
After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came
to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had
never been closed. There was no fence.
As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree
and reading a book.
"Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?" Yeah,
sure, there's a pump over there, come on in."
"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog.
"There should be a bowl by the pump."
They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned
hand pump with a bowl beside it.
The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then
he gave some to the dog.
When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was
standing by the tree.
"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.
"This is Heaven," he answered.
"Well, that's confusing," the Traveler said. "The man down the road
said that was Heaven, too."
"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope.
That's hell."
"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"
No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave
their best friends behind."
I really like this stuff, maybe you'll find it helpful...plus I wanted to put it someplace where I'd remember...
GOOD IDEAS .....
(emailed from a friend)
- Sealed envelope .... Put in the freezer for a few hours, then slide a knife
under the flap. The envelope can then be resealed.
- Use Empty toilet paper roll to store appliance cords. It keeps them neat and
you can write on the roll what appliance it belongs to.
- For icy door steps in freezing temperatures: get warm water and put Dawn dish
washing liquid in it. Pour it all over the steps. They won't refreeze. (I wish
I had known this for the last 40 years.)
- Crayon marks on walls? This worked wonderfully! A damp rag, dipped in baking
soda. Comes off with little effort.
- Permanent marker on appliances/counter tops (like store receipt BLUE)...
Rubbing alcohol on paper towel.
- Whenever I purchase a box of SOS Pads, I immediately take a pair of scissors
and cut each pad into halves. After years of having to throw away rusted and
unused and smelly pads, I finally decided that this could be much more
economical. And now a box of SOS pads last me indefinitely! In fact, I have
noticed that the scissors get sharpened this way!
- Blood stains on clothes? Not to worry! Just pour a little hydrogen peroxide
on a cloth and proceed to wipe off every drop of blood. Works every time! Now,
where to put the body?
- Use vertical strokes when washing windows outside and horizontal for inside
windows. This way you can tell which side has the streaks. Straight vinegar
will get outside windows really clean Don't wash windows on a sunny day. They
will dry too quickly and will probably streak.
- Spray a bit of perfume on the light bulb in any room to create a lovely light
scent in each room when the light is turned on.
- Place fabric softener sheets in dresser drawers and your clothes will smell
freshly washed for weeks to come You can also do this with towels and linen.
- Candles will last a lot longer if placed in the freezer for at least 3 hours
prior to burning.
- To clean artificial flowers, pour some salt into a paper bag and add the
flowers. Shake vigorously as the salt will absorb all the dust and dirt and
leave your artificial flowers looking like new!
- To easily remove burnt on food from your skillet, simply add a drop or two of
dish soap and enough water to cover bottom of pan, and bring to a boil on stove
top.
- Spray your TUPPERWARE with non stick cooking spray before pouring in tomato
based sauces and there won't be any stains.
- Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will
keep for weeks.
- When boiling corn on the cob, add a pinch of sugar to help bring out the
corn's natural sweetness.
- Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead.
The throbbing will go away.
- Don't throw out all that leftover wine: Freeze into ice cubes for future use
in casseroles and sauces. (Left over wine?)
- To get rid of itch from mosquito bites, try applying soap on the area and you
will experience instant relief.
- Ants, ants, ants everywhere .... Well, they are said to never cross a chalk
line. So get your chalk out and draw a line on the floor or wherever ants tend
to march. See for yourself.
- Use air-freshener to clean mirrors. It does a good job and better still,
leaves a lovely smell to the shine.
- When you get a splinter, reach for the scotch tape before resorting to
tweezers or a needle. Simply put the scotch tape over the splinter, then pull
it off. Scotch tape removes most splinters painlessly and easily.
- Now look what you can do with Alka Seltzer. Clean a toilet. Drop in two
Alka Seltzer tablets, wait twenty minutes, brush and flush. The citric acid and
effervescent action clean vitreous China.
- Clean a vase. To remove a stain from the bottom of a glass vase or cruet,
fill with water and drop in two Alka Seltzer tablets.
- Polish jewelry. Drop two Alka Seltzer tablets into a glass of water and
immerse the jewelry for two minutes.
- Clean a thermos bottle. Fill the bottle with water, drop in four Alka
Seltzer tablets, and let soak for an hour (or longer, if necessary).
- Unclog a drain. Clear the sink drain by dropping three Alka Seltzer Tablets
down the drain followed by a cup of Heinz White Vinegar. Wait a few minutes,
then run the hot water. Makes you wonder about ingesting Alka Seltzer, doesn't
it?
TRICKS TO TEACH YOUR BODY . . . . . .
( http://health.msn.com/print.aspx?cp-documentid=100119940)
- If your throat tickles, scratch your ear.
- If you're stuck chatting up a mumbler at a cocktail party, lean in with your right ear. It's better than your left at following the rapid rhythms of speech.
- Need to pee? Thinking about sex preoccupies your brain, so you won't feel as much discomfort.
- German researchers have discovered that coughing during an injection can lessen the pain of the needle stick.
- Forget Sudafed. An easier, quicker, and cheaper way to relieve sinus pressure is by alternately thrusting your tongue against the roof of your mouth, then pressing between your eyebrows with one finger.
- Sleep on your left side to avoid acid reflux.
- To cure a toothache, rub ice on the back of the V-shaped webbed area between your thumb and index finger.
- To get rid of side stitches when you run, exhale as your left foot strikes the ground.
- Blow on your thumb to get your heart rate back to normal.
- Brain freeze? Press your tongue flat against the roof of your mouth, covering as much as you can.
- If your hand falls asleep while you're driving or sitting in an odd position, rock your head from side to side.
- If you're dying to retrieve that quarter from the bottom of the pool, take several short breaths first - essentially, hyperventilate. When you're underwater, it's not a lack of oxygen that makes you desperate for a breath; it's the buildup of carbon dioxide.
MAKING THE EMAIL ROUNDS . . . . . .
Reheat Pizza
Heat up leftover pizza in a non-stick skillet on top of the stove, set heat
to med-low and heat till warm. This keeps the crust crispy. No soggy micro
pizza. I saw this on the cooking channel and it really works.
Easy Deviled Eggs
Put cooked egg yolks in a zip lock bag. Seal, mash till they are all broken
up. Add remainder of ingredients, reseal, keep mashing it up mixing thoroughly,
cut the tip of the baggy, squeeze mixture into egg. Just throw bag away when
done easy clean up.
Expanding Frosting
When you buy a container of cake frosting from the store, whip it with your
mixer for a few minutes. You can double it in size. You get to frost more
cake/cupcakes with the same amount. You also eat less sugar/calories per
serving.
Reheating refrigerated bread
To warm biscuits, pancakes, or muffins that were refrigerated, place them in
a microwave with a cup of water. The increased moisture will keep the food moist
and help it reheat faster.
Newspaper weeds away
Start putting in your plants, work the nutrients in your soil. Wet
newspapers put layers around the plants overlapping as you go cover with mulch
and forget about weeds. Weeds will get through some gardening plastic they will
not get through wet newspapers.
Broken Glass
Use a dry cotton ball to pick up little broken glass pieces of glass - the
fibers catch ones you can't see!
No More Mosquitoes
Place a dryer sheet in your pocket. It will keep the mosquitoes away.
Squirrel Away!
To keep squirrels from eating your plants sprinkle your plants with cayenne
pepper. The cayenne pepper doesn't hurt the plant and the squirrels won't come
near it.
Flexible vacuum
To get something out of a heat register or under the fridge add an empty
paper towel roll or empty gift wrap roll to your vacumn. It can be bent or
flattened to get in narrow openings.
Reducing Static Cling
Pin a small safety pin to the seam of your slip and you will not have a
clingy skirt or dress. Same thing works with slacks that cling when wearing
panty hose. Place pin in seam of slacks and -voila - static is gone.
Measuring Cups
Before you pour sticky substances into a measuring cup, fill it with hot
water. Dump out the hot water, but don't dry the cup. Next, add your
ingredient, such as peanut butter, and watch how easily it comes right out.
Foggy Windshield?
Hate foggy windshields? Buy a chalkboard eraser and keep it in the glove box
of your car. When the windows fog, rub with the eraser! Works better than a
cloth!
Reopening envelope
If you seal an envelope and then realize you forgot to include something
inside, just place your sealed envelope in the freezer for an hour or two.
Voila! It unseals easily.
Conditioner
Use your hair conditioner to shave your legs. It's a lot cheaper than
shaving cream and leaves your legs really smooth. It's also a great way to use
up the conditioner you bought but didn't like when you tried it in your hair.
Goodbye Fruit Flies
To get rid of pesky fruit flies, take a small glass fill it 1/2" with Apple
Cider Vinegar and 2 drops of dishwashing liquid, mix well. You will find those
flies drawn to the cup and gone forever!
Get Rid of Ants
Put small piles of cornmeal where you see ants. They eat it, take it "home,"
and can't digest it so it kills them. It may take a week or so, especially if it
rains, but it works and you don't have the worry about pets or small children
being harmed!
Take baby powder to the beach
Keep a small bottle of baby powder in your beach bag. When you're ready to
leave the beach sprinkle yourself and kids with the powder and the sand will
slide right off your skin.
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